Everywhere I go I see and hear men failing to communicate effectively with women. Some men are worse than others. Some are so bad I feel like walking over to them and putting them out of their misery.
Now don’t get me wrong. I was once that guy. There was a time when I had no idea of how to communicate effectively with women. But I accepted I needed help in this area, so I worked on myself.
I didn’t make changes in my life to become more attractive to women. I made them so I could a compelling life and lifestyle for myself -I naturally became more attractive to women as a result.
Read that last sentence again.
Confession: I don’t have a clue what women want, but no man does. Even the father of modern psychology, Sigmund Freud couldn’t work out what women want:
“The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not been able to answer, despite my thirty years into the feminine souls, is ‘what does a woman want?'”
Honey, do you want to see a move?
A lot of guys will try to work out what a woman wants by asking her. Newsflash: You will not score using this method, sex or otherwise.
This method will annoy her – women, especially high quality women, like men who are in control (not controlling) and can make decisions. It also means she has to draw on her masculine energy because she has to make a decision for you.
This will piss her off and she will become bitchy.
I hear guys asking their woman “what would you like to do for dinner,” or “what do you want to do for your birthday?” or “do you want to go see a movie tonight?”
Now, while I agree a ‘team’ discussion about major decisions that affect both of you is important, asking the above questions only serve to strengthen your inner nice guy routine. And any woman worth her salt loathes the nice guy routine.
It repulses her and will drive her away emotionally, spiritually and eventually physically.
How to kill your inner nice guy
Your inner nice guy must die! Here’s how you can kill him dead: Instead of asking what your woman wants to do pick her up, twirl her around and tell her to “put on something nice…I’m taking you out to dinner,” or “pack enough clothes for the weekend…don’t ask where we’re going…it’s a surprise for your birthday and you’re going to love it,” or “I feel like seeing a movie tonight…last one to the car is a rotten egg.”
Feminine energy is about bonding, being playful and spontaneous, laughing, dancing, love and opening up to receive love – David Deida.
By communicating in the way I’ve described above she will open up emotionally, spiritually and physically and won’t care where you’re going or what you’re having for dinner or even what movie you will see because she will be in her feminine energy, feeling safe and secure, relaxed and happy. She can trust your masculine core.
And this means you will score, sex or otherwise!
Which one are you?
When you’re out with your mates trying to ‘pick-up,’ waiting in line at Starbucks or interacting with women how is your body language? Do you look nervous and unsure of yourself like this guy:
Or confident, relaxed, taking up too much space, and more invested in yourself than her, like this guy:
Most guys I see when I’m out look like the first guy.
As the night goes on and the booze kicks in the following happens: they will start approaching ‘the hot girls’ and blabber on about what they do and how much money they make and come across as weak or needy or use some weird ‘pick up line.’
‘The hot girls’ will either (a) reject them or (b) use them for free drinks.
Whereas the second guy either has girls approach him, put themselves in his orbit, or invite him to come talk to them. His body language communicates confidence, dominance and high self-esteem.
He knows his value and worth on a deep level.
He is neither weak nor needy; rather he sees himself as a catch and has the mindset that any girl he meets is lucky to come across a great guy like him.
He conveys this with confidence and a smile on his face, not with arrogance.
He couldn’t care less if the woman likes him or not; he knows beautiful women are everywhere so he doesn’t need to impress her or use some weird ‘PUA’ tactic or line to get her to like him.
He knows women are more attracted to a guy who is confident, has character and invested highly in himself than good looks, money and nice clothes.
So why are women drawn to this type of body language?
Find out here