In part 5 of How To Communicate Effectively With Women we learned how to spot a compliance and congruence test, why women use them and looked at ways to manage them.
I finished on why a woman keeps testing you despite passing her tests.
So why does she keep testing?
Because she invested in you, emotionally, physically, sexually, but…
she needs to make sure you’re staying on the path of masculine maturity.
She needs to feel safe and secure.
If you’re not being the MAN she needs, you’re giving her female mind an excuse to conjure up ways to either affirm or suppress her insecurities – by testing you. – Bruce Bryans.
And the testing is savage, believe me.
In my last long-term relationship I wasn’t the man my partner needed.
I was weak, needy and approval seeking.
Don’t get me wrong I stood up to her most times when she pushed my boundaries or spoke to me a disrespectful way.
But I failed her tests because I was aggressive rather than assertive.
I reacted rather than responded.
I didn’t know how to communicate effectively with women.
I would say sorry for upsetting her.
And do almost anything to make things better so she wouldn’t stay upset with me.
This made her lack confidence in my masculine core.
So she tested me…
day and night.
I failed them every time.
We fought constantly.
We couldn’t stand the sight of each other.
Sex went from every night to hardly at all.
She started going out more and more with her friends.
Then I found out she’d cheated on me.
I blamed her for what happened.
It was all her fault.
Her bitchy, disrespectful behaviour and inability to communicate is why our relationship fell apart.
I still believe that.
But I now accept that I failed her as a man.
Had I known how to communicate effectively with women back then things may have been different.
I would’ve known why she was testing and how to handle those tests.
I would have stood up to her in an assertive, masculine mature way.
I would’ve known how to bring her back into her feminine.
Which would’ve excited her emotionally and sexually.
And I would’ve scored (incredibly hot) sex or otherwise whenever I wanted.
So how do you bring her back into her feminine?
First of all, let’s look at why she’s out of her feminine.
Men and women have both masculine and feminine energy.
If a man is too much in his feminine he is effeminate.
If a woman is too much in her masculine she is an intolerable bitch.
And chances are you as a man have made her that way…
by not knowing what to do when she’s upset or has a visit from the ‘ghost of Christmas crazy.’
You come home from work over the moon because you just got a promotion.
You tell your partner the good news and all she can say is “that’s nice.”
“Is that all you have to say?'” you ask her.
“What do you want me to say…that you’re a lazy slob who can’t keep his promises?”
“What are you talking about?” you ask, becoming agitated.
“Never mind…I’m happy you got your stupid promotion.”
She storms off and your left standing there wondering what the fuck just happened.
You grab a beer from the fridge and turn on the TV.
A few hours later she reveals why she was upset.
“You said you would fix the back door before you left this morning. I’ve asked you twice now.”
“Crap, you’re right…I’ll fix it now.”
“Don’t bother…I’ll get Jane’s husband to do it…he looks good holding a drill.”
What do you do next?
A. Get jealous, tell her she’s out of line and that she should be happy for you regardless of the fact you didn’t do what you said you would.
B. Say ‘cool’ and continue drinking your beet and watching TV?
C. Pick her up, twirl her around then lay her on the couch and blow raspberries on her belly and tell her you’ve fantasized about Jane’s husband holding a drill as well?
Of course the answer is C. This is how you communicate effectively with women when they’re in their masculine.
This is how you put her back into her feminine.
She can relax and trust your masculine core.
She feels safe and secure.
Which means she can relax and celebrate your success.
She will become aroused.
The most erotic moment for a woman is feeling that you are Shiva, the divine masculine: Imperturbable, totally loving, fully present, and all-pervading – David Deida
You will fuck each other to smithereens.
Ten minutes later she will test you again…
And as the superior man you wouldn’t have it any other way.
As always, thanks for reading.
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